feelings I say

I feel like I'm drifting with the clouds on so high in this blue autumn sky.
A joyful surrounding is caressing my feelings.
Like a forlorn dewdrop I stay on the edge of the grass thinking if to fall or not.
A cold breeze blows shivering all my hidden aches.
my feelings, they haunt me sometimes.
You would say, what is the point of feeling when you can not express your feelings.
But look at me, I still have hope, i can bloom with new dreams and may be... may be someday I would be able to speak louder the words I'm thinking or mumbling.
Would it be enough to let the world know?
who would understand?

And I don't know if I'm strong enough to fight back every hard truth that's ready to smash me.

Days are duller sometimes, but the sun shines in its own way always. So I follow the sun. I carry the strength in me of shinning on after heavy rain, upon the sky.

Feelings of being empty, feelings of being defeated and ignored, being hurt and betrayed, i have those. But do I show?

No. I don't.

I hold them deep in me.

And the day I find you, I'll pour my love of pain in my devotion towards you.

I believe you would be there for me, always and forever, to listen with me the stories of fallen leaves and raindrops.

till then, take care.

~ Yours Pixie

Because..

My another sleepless night had passed, another rainy day in Autumn had began...and I missed you.
Do I know you?
No, you don't think so; nor do I.

You don't know me truly...and I know, you never would.

But still I'm so obsessed with you, with your eyes, your words. And those leave me with nothing but a deeper wound in the heart.
By entity is buried in your wilderness....
my love towards you is like the fragrance to flower, the colors to sky, the melody to music...
no, I am not a mad person. Most probably.

I appear to be quite alright.
It's just that I cant hold my suppressed feelings anymore within a little me.
There's left a world to tell you...
But look, I'm shattered, lost in this solitary moment...

Because the tears are falling,
Because the time is passing,
Because this moment is fading
In an  ocean of endless pain,
And I'm still standing here for you...

....

p.s.~ I love You.

- yours Pixie.